Cloudy days!

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It rained today, bitter cold rain, came pouring down, not just on the outside but also on my plans of a quick 3 mile run. I know, I wrote about hopes, luck and high spirits a day before, but isn’t today another day?

 I have been tipsy since yesterday, dint write a thing, dint click a picture, been too happy, too sad!

 The thing we worked for all year-long, prayed day and night and hoped for to happen has happened yesterday, leaving me to wonder how I will go along. My Man, MY MAN, is moving away, not to another city, another town but to a whole new world, a far continent away. I haven’t been afraid in a long while, but last night I dreamt of being bullied again. He gave me the courage, I so needed to fight off my fears and now I am worried if I really had it in me all along.

He will be away and I will be here waiting to join him some day. Would I be same without him? Would I be able to carry on? I seem to be suddenly afraid of the dark. I know I need to be strong, if not for mine then for his sake, so that he can leave in peace. Is it stupid to pretend to be strong on the outside and come over here and spell out your each fear? I don’t know, I don’t wish to find out. I know life is not going to be same and for that I need to get strong.   

 

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12 responses »

  1. Good for you for getting out there! A run can fix so many things, but not everything. Everything will work out the way it’s supposed to. The seperation will be tough…but you are stronger than you think!

  2. Though outwardly a shroud of gloom, the core of every cloud is bright and shining.

    May you have the strength to withstand the pressure and pain of separation.God bless you!

  3. It is hard to have a love one away from you. I pray that you will find courage and strength. Video cams and Skype helps for communication but it can’t replace physical presence. One helps, keeping yourself busy, getting friends around you, talking about it. Hope all will be well with you. Have a great weekend.

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