Tag Archives: Future

Disposable!

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Apart from my usual photography work,  I am currently working on a collection of very short stories that I hope to get published in near future. Recently, I seemed to have run out of ideas for any more such short narrations and that reminded me of my almost forgotten blog.

As I went through what I had written earlier, I saw a missing theme, a much needed central idea for me to come up with those 100 stories that I want in this book. I wanted to write it here before I forget it since this blog has been my special place.

“Our Shelves, Our Markets, Our Lives are filled with Disposable commodities.

Our choices are becoming smart, we even use smarter objects every day. Amidst all this fast paced, ever changing life, our dimensions of human connection or “Love” per se, has changed.

We are today a smart generation with disposable relations, with too many objects and too few emotions, both equally at display on a Facebook home page.”

 

Life, huh!

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My fingers have been a little shaky lately, and I feel a pit in my stomach too deep to be dealt with, so I ponder no more.

No, I am not sick, not now I think, but I still can not shake the weakness off my soul.

Well, that’s how I feel when I get nostalgic or have a nausea of a cause, I can not single out.

And moments ago, as I sat here, watching the last episode of Scrubs season 8, somewhere between the song, I figured, what’s wrong.

Ever since this year has started, every thing has changed, every Single thing. (Not complaining, I know it’s for good!)

I have finally found the nicest place, but it’s not HOME!!!

I can not understand most of the words I hear in the street,  I no longer know the best cereal brands out there, so I don’t get to have my blueberry mornings, my Skippy is no longer chunky and I can’t find the same cosy fragrance of my fabric conditioner. So, no, it’s not the Same….

I am in way better shape than I was, just a few months ago, but still every few days I have to Push myself just to go on…

I guess that’s what you call, The Fear of Unknown….

Damn you, the fear! I am not afraid, so I will go on, just a moment more….

Li’l things!

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It’s amazing how we go through life, wishing for all the big things/days, or defining moments, that will change our
lives. Starting from, Learning to walk or may be just growing up faster, First day at high school, first date/kiss, Graduation day, Getting married, hopefully not getting divorced and having kids and the list goes on….

But really?

Is it really on these days/moments that we turn into someone new?

Sure, we do get to change last name (if you wish) or get a title (if you are a doctor), but apart from that, does any of this really change anything?

I keep wondering, how, there are millions of little things, that make us who we are and yet, we never seem to be  aware, of them even happening!

I mean, I waited, and I really mean, ‘standing on one foot, holding my breath’, waited, for the life to happen somewhere in past 29 and a half years, but strangely enough I neglected every single minute I was living it.

And it applies to every thing, Like, men think, they need to buy pearly necklaces, for their woman to be really happy, when she might be just as content, in being asked out for a cup of coffee once in a while by the same man she’s been married to, for as long as she can remember. Similarly, a woman may be killing herself in the gym to stay sexy, to be wanted, when all she needs is, to be happy and smile, to attract a decent bloke.

Every couple wishes for their kids to do big things in life, they aren’t even born and the blue print of whole life is already set for the poor little kid.

Why? Why, is it so important for every thing to happen at a grand level?

Why, we don’t seem to understand that, the gravity was discovered, in a quiet moment, under an apple tree or how a single seagull led to spit fire, hence changing the world history.

There is nothing wrong in wanting to reach stars, but its the desire to leap, It’s, forgetting, that it takes millions of tiny little steps to get there, is what leads us to the unhappiness we feel.

**Only words are mine. Image is thankfully borrowed from http://mysite.verizon.net/vzepir4z/footprints/index.html

Cloudy days!

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It rained today, bitter cold rain, came pouring down, not just on the outside but also on my plans of a quick 3 mile run. I know, I wrote about hopes, luck and high spirits a day before, but isn’t today another day?

 I have been tipsy since yesterday, dint write a thing, dint click a picture, been too happy, too sad!

 The thing we worked for all year-long, prayed day and night and hoped for to happen has happened yesterday, leaving me to wonder how I will go along. My Man, MY MAN, is moving away, not to another city, another town but to a whole new world, a far continent away. I haven’t been afraid in a long while, but last night I dreamt of being bullied again. He gave me the courage, I so needed to fight off my fears and now I am worried if I really had it in me all along.

He will be away and I will be here waiting to join him some day. Would I be same without him? Would I be able to carry on? I seem to be suddenly afraid of the dark. I know I need to be strong, if not for mine then for his sake, so that he can leave in peace. Is it stupid to pretend to be strong on the outside and come over here and spell out your each fear? I don’t know, I don’t wish to find out. I know life is not going to be same and for that I need to get strong.